Hogwarts, meet the Cullens
by jewelthebrat
Summary: Edward,Bella,Alice,Jasper,Rosalie and Emmett all get sucked into the fifth Harry Potter Book because Edward reads a note in the back of it.But if to many changes are made, then they will become traped in the book FOREVER! What will happen?
1. Chapter 1: What could possible happen?

**Hello fans of Twilight or Harry Potter. (or both) This is my first story so PLEASE comment. I would just like to say that the idea for the story wasn't completely mine. The idea that the Cullens (And Bella) get sucked into a Harry potter book is xlady-cullenx. There story, thought, has the twilight characters in the third Harry potter book, Not the fifth. So without further a due, I would like to present Hogwarts, meet the Cullens.**

**Chapter 1**

**What could possible happen? **

**E.P.O.V.**

I was in the living room sitting on the couch reading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. It was almost midnight and Bella, the love of my life, was lying on my lap, half-asleep.

Esma had told Charlie that Carlisle took me, Jasper and Emmett camping while Alice, Rosalie and her were having a sleepover. Of course, none of that was true. Carlisle was working at the hospital, Emmett, Jasper, Alice and Rosalie were playing Mouse Trap on the floor in front of me (being VERY loud) and Esma was the only one, who in fact, was camping. Well, hunting actually.

I finished the book and was about to shut it when I noticed on the very last page a note scribbled in.

_READ OUT LOUD AT OWN RISK. _

_Strange. _I thought.

"Oh yeah! I won!" Emmett yelled jumping up and pumping his arm in the air. "

Hay guys" I said. Still mesmerized by the strange message.

"What's up Edward?" Alice asked

"Something wrong?" Bella mumbled

"No, love, nothings wrong" I answered Bella first. "There's a wired message in this book." I told them

"What's it say?" Emmett asked

"I don't know. I haven't read it yet. Before it, it says read out loud at own risk though."

"Read it anyway" Emmett said Enthusiastically. "At own risk" he mumbled under his breath. "Where vampires for god-sake! What could possible happen?"

"All right" I said unsure, But I started to read anyway. I could feel everyone eyes on me and felt Bella stir a little in my lap,and I started to read the note.

_"If you are read this out loud BEWARE! In fact if you're reading it to yourself, or by yourself, beware. You're better off reading this with a group of friends. In fact if you're not, go get some, and continue on."_ I gave them a wary glance. They smiled back encouragingly and I went on.

_"You have followed Harry Potter throughout his four years at Hogwarts, now you, lucky reader, will join him in his fifth." _As I was reading, I could see the walls around me start to melt and spin, but I couldn't stop reading. _"Be careful thought. If too many changes are made, you will not be able to leave. I understand, young reader that changes are a must. But if you, let's say, mange to convince Harry that his godfather is not at the ministry and he doesn't go to the ministry. that is a change that will cause you to become trapped in the book forever." _

The wall surrounding me became more solid, But they weren't the colors of our living room, but red and gold. Gryffindor house colors, I realized. _"You should, I suggest, go see the headmaster at once, so you may be sorted into one of the houses. Do not be surprise, as you brought this on yourself. You were warned, now you must pay the price. (Which I believe is a fairly good one. Who wouldn't want to enter a Harry Potter book and live a year at Hogwarts?)_

_Sincerely,J.K. Rowling." _

As I finished reading, I looked up only to be greeted with the shocked faces of my family in front of me.

_Wow _Alice thought

_What the---- _Rosalie thought

_I__ can't believe---- _jasper thought

"That could happen" Emmett said and grinned.

* * *

**B.P.O.V. **

"Sincerely, J.K. Rowling." Edward finished reading.

By this time my eyes were fully opened. Before I came over I had felt a little sick and dizzy. The walls melting and spinning where not helping. I didn't tell Edward because I knew if I told him I didn't feel well, he would make a big deal out of it. He thinks I way to fragile.

"That could happen" Emmett said grinning. Leave it to Emmett to make a joke out of this. Apparently Rose felt the same way, for she smacked the back of his head

"Ow. What was the for" He asked rubbing the spot she had hit him.

"For you joking around about the very serious issue of us getting sucked it to a book." She told him.

"Sorry" he mumbled. My head was still spinning as I tried to get off the couch. That was a bad idea on my part. The second I was up, I collapsed on the ground, or I would have if Edward hadn't caught me.

"Bella" He said. His voice full of alarm and worry. "Are you alright?"

"Yes. I'm fine." I lied squeezing my eyes shut. " Just dizzy from the walls spinning." At least that part wasn't a lie. It just wasn't completely the truth. He helped me back onto the couch. He kept his arm around my waist and kept glancing at me while he talked. It was making me feel very self-conscious.

* * *

**E.P.O.V.**

"What are we going to do?" I asked the others. I kept glancing at Bella to make sure she was alright and not lying to me. I almost didn't catch her and I don't want her to collapse again.

"Well I think we should start by figuring where the hell we are!" Rosalie said, her voice rising with every word.

"Can you keep it down , babe? Your yelling combined with you hitting me in the back of the head is giving me a really bed headache." Emmett said.

"I WILL NOT KEEP IT DOWN!"

"Rose, he's right. You have to keep it down. There are people sleeping upstairs. I can hear them." I said.

"Dose anyone know....where...we...are...." She asked. You could hear the strain in her voice from her trying to keep it at a reasonable level.

"We're in Gryffindor common room." Bella whispered. She looked very pale. Pretty much as pale as me! She had a strange sallow, almost green look to her face. I noticed that they were looking at her with a questioning expression.

"She's read the book's too you know" I told them. I was about to ask her if she was alright but Alice beat me to it.

"Bella, your looking green. Are you alright?" Alice asked. Bella nodded her head slowly, closing her eyes and rested her head on my shoulder.

"Alright, now that we know where we are, what are we going to do?" Rosalie asked.

"We should get out of the common room before someone wakes up and sees us." I suggested.

"Then we should do what the note said and go find the headmaster.....um, what's his name?" Alice asked.

"Dumbledore" Bella and I both said at the same time. She blushed, bring back a little color to her face. I gave her a crocked smile, which made her blush even harder.

"Lets go" Jasper said and proceeded to walk towards the exist. The others followed behind him. I gave Bella a kiss on her forehead.

"Are you alright to walk my love?" I asked her.

"Yes" She said, blushing again. We stood up and she tried to take a step, but collapsed into my arms in the process. I helped her out of the portrait hole in time to see Emmett skipping down the corroder

"wheeeeerrrrrreeeeee off to see the wizard, the wonder- OW!" Rosalie had hit Emmett

"Have some respect! He's a teacher!" she hissed. Though I thought It was hilarious. So did Bella Alice and Jasper, because it looked like they were trying very hard not to laugh.


	2. Chapter 2: This should be fun

**O.k. seeing as so many people liked the first chapter, I'm putting the second one up earlier. So here is the second chapter of my story. enjoy.**

**Chapter 2**

**This should be fun.**

**E.P.O.V.**

I lead my family to where I thought Professor Dumbledore's office was. Thank god I was right. By the time we got there Rosalie was about to rip someone's head off from annoyance, I could hear Professor Dumbledore's thoughts coming not from his office, but around the corner.

_I wonder what the password should be next. hummmm. _

I assumed his was thinking about the password for his office, always a different type of candy in the stories.

"Get ready. He's about to come around that corner" I whispered. We stood there waiting for only a minute when he came around the corner, took a look at all our faces, and stopped. He looked at all of us, then shifted his gaze questioningly at Bella.

_How odd._ he thought. _A group of vampires and a human is with them. They don't look like the normal vampires we have here. And the one with the brownish hair. He looks familiar _With that thought his face turned white and I saw in his mind remembering a boy, from last year, who died in the triwizard tournament at the hand of Lord Voldemort.

_Cedric Diggory._

"Sir, I'm not Cedric." I told him. When I did, he when even whiter then he already had.

"How did you-" He began, but I cut him off

"Perhaps it would be better to step into your offices, so we can tell you who we are and….explain?" Alice suggested

" Yes, of course." He said, snapping out of his moment of shock. He came towards us, looked at the gargoyle.

"Lemon drops" He told the gargoyle. It leaped aside, reviling a spiral staircase.

"Whoa!" Emmett said as he jumped. Alice Jasper and Rosalie jumped from shock too. Me and Bella were the only ones who didn't.

_Hummmmm. They didn't jump like the others. I wonder….Well, she looks like she's going to pass out at any second. We should get her to the hospital wing after this. But why didn't he jump? _Dumbledore thought.

I looked down at Bella and realized he was right. Instead of looking better, she looked worse. As Dumbledore lead my family up to his office I turned to Bella.

" You look worse then before? Would you like me to carry you up the stairs?" I asked her.

"No. I'm fine" She said very quietly. We went up the stairs into his office. He went behind his desk and sat down. He took one look at us gathered by the door, flicked his wrist, and 5 chairs appeared out of thin air. Bella and me where the only ones who didn't jump again. We all took a seat and Bella sat on my lap.

"So why don't you start with who you are?" Dumbledore said

"I'm Edward Cullen, this is Bella, and that's Rosalie, Alice, Jasper and Emmett. And yes, we are vampires. All except Bella."

_Interesting. I wonder if she knows. And how can they resist her blood? Is she not human? She looks human enough? And how dose that one boy know what I'm thinking? Can he read my mind? Is he reading it right now? That would be interesting. Can he read everyone's mind?_ _I wonder. Do the others have talents then? _Dumbledore thought

"That's a lot of questions. Lets start with the first one. Yes, Bella knows, and yes she is human. Where not like normal vampires in that, we feed off of animals instead of humans. And I love Bella, so I would never hurt her. Yes I can read your mind. I can read everyone's mind for instance, Mr. Flich is thinking about how he wished he could hang students by the ears for detention like before, and is wondering if he asked nice enough, you would let him carry around a whip." I told him. He chuckled " There's only one persons mind I cant read and that is Bella's."

"And what about the others. Can they read minds like you, or do they have a different talent?" he asked me

"I can see the future of a person from the path they are on right now." Alice said.

"I can control emotions. Like calm an angry mob, or a bunch of nervous people. And vise versa." Jasper said.

"Interesting. Now, how did you get into the castle? And what brought you here?" he asked

" Well, that's a long story." Alice said.

" I believe we have some time in which to tell it."

" Alright. So I was sitting on the couch reading Harry potter and the order of the phoenix-" I started to say when he cut me off.

" Did you say Harry potter and the order of the phoenix?" Dumbledore asked looking shocked

"Yes…..Harry Potter's life since his first year at Hogwarts to his last has been made into a book." Edward said

"I see. So any human can read it?"

"Or vampire" said Alice

"Or werewolf." Emmett said. I glared at him when I felt Bella flinch in my lap.

"Sorry." he mumbled

" What is wrong with werewolves?" Dumbledore asked

"My best friend became a werewolf. They're different from the werewolves you have here. They kind of like and Animagi. But if they lose control of their emotions when your standing to close, you can get really hurt. You won't turn into one if they scratch you though' Bella whispered from my lap.

"So you don't want to get hurt?" Dumbledore asked.

"Edward doesn't want me to get hurt" she mumbled. "I know he would never hurt me, but Edward doesn't want to take the chance" Then she closed her eyes and rested her head on my shoulder.

"Why don't you continue on?"

"I'll tell it. When you tell stories, they always sound so boring" Alice said and continued on with telling the story "So everyone except Bella and Edward were playing Mouse Trap on the floor. it's a human board game."

"I won" Emmett said.

"We know you won Emmett. Anyway, Edward noticed a note in the book, but before it, it said read out loud at own risk. So Emmett tells him to read it anyway, and he did. As he was reading, the walls started to melt and spin around and around." As she said this. I noticed Bella's face, which had started to look better, go back to being the sallow green color. "And it kept spinning and spinning and spi-"

"Alright Alice, I think he knows what the walls were doing." I told her, not wanting Bella to get worse. She began to glare at me when she saw Bella and realized why I interrupted her.

"Oh. Sorry Bella." She said. Bella nodded and Alice continued.

"When Edward finished reading, the walls became solid and we ended up in the Gryffindor common room. In the letter, it said we should come and see you so we could get sorted into one of the house because we will be stuck in the book until the end of the it, meaning the end of this school year. But, if the book changes to much, we'll be stuck here forever." Alice finished.

"I see. Would you like to spend a year at Hogwarts then?" Dumbledore asked us

"yes" I said. Bella nodded in agreement.

"I think it would be interesting" Jasper said.

"Me too" Said Alice

"This should be fun" Emmett said.

"Everyone else is staying, so why not" Rosalie said.

"Well then, I guess we should get you into a house. I will just put you into Gryffindor, so you may stay together. I think you should fit well in with fifth year. I will introduce you all to the students tomorrow at breakfast. If you would meet me at the oak front doors at 8 a.m. I will have some wands, school books and school robes with me there. We will need a story as to why you are late. I don't want to tell them you are vampires or that Harry's life is a book, and I don't think you want them to know you are vampires either. The password to get back into the Gryffindor common room is Mimbulus Mimbletonia. But I do think it might be a good idea to bring Bella down to the hospital wing, she doesn't look very well." He said.

"Yes, you're right on all accounts. Thank you sir." I said.

"Wait. What happens if, in the end we can't get back?" Emmett asked

"I say we deal with that if time comes." Dumbledore said.

"Good plan. Good night sir." Emmett said. Everyone stood up and filled out of the room saying good night as well. I carried Bella, she didn't protest at all, and I realized that something was wrong. She always protests a little when I carry her. I felt her forehead. It was hot, as always, but it seemed warmer then normal.

"Bella, I think you're really sick. I'm going to take you to the hospital wing o.k.?" I told her. She nodded her head slightly and I carried her down there with my family at my heals. When we got there, after explaining that we transferred from a different school and were a missed the train to Hogwarts, Madame Pomfrey had me put Bella on a bed and she gave her some potion

"she will be fine in the morning." She said. I thanked her, kissed Bella on the forehead, and said

" I'll be back in the morning, love. I don't understand how you became suddenly sick."

" I didn't feel well before I came over" she mumbled

"Bella" I chuckled " you could have told me when you came. I didn't know what was wrong with you or what to do about it. I thought It had something to do with getting sucked into the book."

at that point, Rosalie started complained about wanting to go to the common room so I had to lead them there. When we got there, we gave the fat lady the password and went inside. "

She's really called the fat lady? That's how people remember her? Seriously?" Emmett asked laughing after the portrait closed. We all sat on the couch or on the chairs waiting for when the first person got up. That was when we would leave. I decided to read my family's mind to see what they were thinking. I was hoping it would distract me from thinking about being away from Bella.

_At least we're in the same house _though. I thought to myself.

_I can't wait to start learning magic. This will be very interesting._ Jasper thought.

_Ugh. These colors will get boring after awhile. And they're ugly. How can they live with these for seven years? _Alice thought

_Where am I supposed to do my hair here? _Rose thought

_I wonder what the people will think of us when tomorrow at breakfast. I'm glad Edward can read minds. This shall be an interesting time._ Emmett thought That's when I remembered that we would be introduced to the school tomorrow.

_Maybe someone will figure out where vampires. I thought. If anyone did. It would be Hermione. _

We sat there the rest of the night, waiting until morning.

**That was it. I hoped you enjoyed it. please try to review. next post should be sunday or monday. :)**


	3. Chapter 3: One long year

**Hello everyone. again, I'm updating a day sooner then I said. I would just like to let you know that this chapters name was supposed to be one long year, not the last obe. So it has been changed. I hope to get enjoy this chapter.**

**Chapter 3**

**One long year.**

**E.P.O.V. **

At 7:50 we all went down to the hospital wing to get Bella before we were introduced to the school.

"Edward calm down" Jasper said. obviously feeling my anxiety. " Humans get colds or the flu all the time. She lucky we got sucked into the book. She should already be fine thanks to that potion, without it she could have been sick for 3 or 4 days."

"I can't help it. What if it was worse then a cold or the flu?" I said, a burst of calm came over me.

"Thanks" I mumbled.

"Any time." he said smiling, then looked at me with a serious face. "She'll be fine. Even if it was worse, she would have already taken a potion to make her better."

We continued down to the hospital wing in silence. When we got there, I ran over to Bella and kissed her forehead. Madame Pomfrey came bustling out of her office in her night gown "

Who's the- Oh. it just you. What do you need?" she asked.

"Bella. We're supposed to meet the headmaster in 5 minutes." I said. She pursed her lips.

_She needs to sleep. but if the headmaster need to see them.... _

"Alright, but make sure she goes to sleep early tonight. She needs sleep." She told me.

"I will do that. Thank you." I said. She left the room to go back into her office.

_Its times like these_ I thought to myself _That the muffliato spell would come in handy. _I turned to Bella.

"Bella, love, its time to wake up. We need to go see the headmaster." I whispered in her ear. She opened her eyes a bit then mumbled

"morning Edward."

All of a sudden her eyes flew opened, she kicked her legs off the side of the bed and got off. She stumbled and I caught her.

"Thanks" she said.

"What was that about?" I asked her

"I just remembered we're trapped in a book." She told me. I laughed and gave her a crocked smile. Her eyes got big and she had this dazed expression.

"Are you feeling better?" I asked her. She didn't answer right away. "Bella?" I Said getting anxious. She snapped out of her look.

"You dazzled me" She said accusingly "What did you ask?"

"Are you feeling better" Chuckling and shaking my head.

"Yes. We're meeting Dumbledore soon, right?"

"In 3 minutes. come on, we need to get down there." I said scooping her into my arms, while she protested.

_back to normal_ I thought, running down the halls with my family behind me.

We reached to front door's within 2 minutes. Even with super speed, this school is ran right up to Dumbledore. Who was standing with piles of books, robes and what I assumed was potion ingredients. He jumped when he saw us appear.

"You have super speed? Very interesting."

"It comes in handy." Emmett said.

"I see….Your looking better Bella. I'm glad to see that."

"Thank you, sir. I'm feeling much better thanks to Madame Pomfrey"

"Wonderful. Now, as you can clearly see, I have all your school supplies here." he said, gesturing to the things that lay next to him. "And here are your wands" he said as he pulled 6 sticks out of his pockets. He gave one to each of us. When he gave me mine, it tingled in my hand. I wondered if the others felt the same tingle.

"Remember to be careful, you can do magic with these." he said with a stern look, then smiled. "Your school supplies will be brought up to your dormitories, so you may get changed and grab your stuff for class after breakfast. Speaking of breakfast, I believe we should go introduce you all. Are you ready?" We all nodded. "alright, I will go and tell them….do you have a story I can tell them as to why you are here? Even though you don't hunt humans, I prefer not to let the students know that you're vampires. I believe you feel the same way, correct? Also the fact Harry's life has been turned into a book. If you could not tell them that. Harry's life is hard enough…well, If you have read the stories, you know.

"Yes. As for the why we are here, we transferred from a different school and missed the train."

"That sounds believable. I will go in and tell them about you transferring and missing the train, then you come through the doors. Does that sound good?" we all nodded "Alright, lets get going." and he walked over to the door that led to the great hall, opened them, walked inside and then shut them again

* * *

**D.P.O.V. **

I walked into the great hall, down in-between the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw table, and stood at the front of the hall facing the students.

"Attention" I said "Your attention please." immediately everyone became quiet.

"We have some new students joining us. They transferred from another school and missed the train. I would ask you to make them feel welcome as our school is different from ours. They have been put into the Gryffindor house. Please welcome Edward, Bella, Jasper, Alice, Emmett and Rosalie." I said, and the doors to the great hall opened

* * *

**E.P.O.V. **

"And Rosalie." We heard Dumbledore say and I opened the doors. We went inside two at a time. The shock on there faces was priceless. That's one thing I like about going to different schools. The peoples, in this case wizards and witches, face when they see us. I knew Bella would be uncomfortable with everyone staring at us, so I tried to get us to the Gryffindor table as soon as possible. When we got there, we sat down. Everyone was still staring. I ignored them as best I could.

"Bella, you should eat something." I said to her. She grabbed a piece of toast and started nibbling on it. Then, I heard Alice's thought as if she was screaming them at me instead of thinking them.

_Harry Potter is starring at Bella. _

My head snapped up and I searched the table for him. Sure enough, he was starring at Bella. I read his thought

_She probable doesn't like me. Wait, I'm Harry Potter. Oh yeah, I came out with Cedrics body claming that Voldemort returned. And the Daily Prophet is telling everyone I'm A Attaching-seeking lire. _I put my arm around Bella.

_OI! IS HE HER BOYFRIEND????? He probable is. What rotten Luck. I bet she agrees with the prophet and thinks I'm a nut case anyway._ His thoughts turned to some day-dreams about Bella I really wished he wasn't thinking. A low growl escaped my mouth.

"What's wrong Edward" Bella asked me "Nothing, love." I said. she looked at me skeptically for a minute, then went back to eating her toast.

_This _I thought _Is going to be a long year._

**_What do you think so far?_**


	4. Chapter 4: Me and my big mouth

**O.K. so i forgot this in the other chapters**

**disclamer: I don not own twilight, or Harry Potter. It makes me sad, but I don't. :(**

**Chapter 4**

**Me and my big mouth**

**E.P.O.V. **

"That was soooo boring." Emmett said as we walked out of history of magic.

"I know. I thought J.K. was exaggerating when she wrote about him. I guess not." I said

"I thought so too. That means, if she wasn't exaggerating about one teacher, she probable wasn't exaggerating about the others. Which means Snape….." I trailed off

"Oh no, I almost forgot about him." I said, remembering how the author described him as the meanest teacher ever.

"What's so bad about Snape?" Jasper asked "You'll see." I said.

"After potions, we have divination. You'll be good at that Alice." I told her. And Bella laughed

" Why will I be good at that?" she asked, Taking back by Bella laughing.

"Because, Its all about seeing the future." Bella said. Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie and I joined Bella laughing.

"Well, at least there's one class I won't have to worry about." She said shrugging. just then, some one bumbed into me.

"I'm sorry" she said.

"Thats o.k. um...whats your name?"

"Hermione Granger" she said.

"It perfectly fine, Hermione." I said. and she walked away.

_**He was so cold. and hard as a rock** _she thought and I laughed.

We heard the bell and hurried down to the dungeons. By the time we reached there, the doors were just starting to open. We split up. Bella, Alice and me at a table, while Emmett Rosalie and Japer took one next to ours as far to the back as possible. Harry, Ron and Hermoine had the one as far back as possible.

"Settle down" Snape said as he shut the door behind being him, Although there really was no reason to say it. As soon as the door shut everyone went silent as if they all died. He started off on a rant about O.W.L.S. that I wasn't paying attention to. I was far to busy reading Harry Potters thoughts, As they went back to being on Bella. _T_

_**Here she is again. so beautiful. I can't believe he's her BOYFRIEND....maybe there just brother and sister**. _he thought a little to hopeful. I'll kiss Bella in front of him later, But right now, I had to focus on the task at hand. Making the Draught of Peace.

The instructions appeared on the board with a flick of his wrist (Thankfully, no one in my family jumped.) And the supple cupboard opened. We were all kept busy the rest of the time making the potion, I had helped Bella with hers when she needed help, and when there where ten minutes left, All of our potions were producing the light sliver vapor. Even Emmett managed to produce it. I was shocked with that. As Snape made his way to Harry cauldron, I remembered what was to come next. So did Bella because I felt her stiffen when she noticed where Snape was headed.

"Potter, what is this supposed to be?" he asked. "The Draught of Peace." Harry said

_**What does he think it is? I hope the new girl Bella isent listing. She has enough reason to think I'm a freak**__. _he thought.

" Tell me potter" Snape said " Can you read?"

Draco laughed

"Yes, I can." harry said, tightening his grip on his wand.

"Read the third line of the instructions for me, Potter" Harry squinted as he read the third line.

"Add powdered moonstone, stir three times counterclockwise, allow to simmer for seven minutes, then add two drops of syrup of hellebore.

_**Crap**. _he thought. _**I forgot the stupid hellebore.** __**She defiantly going to think I'm an idiot now**__. _

"Did you do everything on the third line, Potter?"

"No" Harry said so quietly any human could barely hear him.

"I beg your pardon" Snape said

"No. I forgot the hellebore" he said louder then the first time.

"I know you did, Potter, which means this mess is utterly worthless. _Evanesco_" and the contents of Harry's cauldron disappeared. Snape satrted to say something, But again I wasn't paying attenchen because I was listing to Harry's thoughts

_**Thats just great. She probable thinks I'm stupid and psycho. What am I going to do. Maybe I'll get lucky. and she'll say hi or wave to me out of potions....maybe she likes smart boy who can produce what Snape asked them to. **_Harry Thought, referring to me.

_**"**_Bella" I said. realizing what we were supposed to be doing and filled my flask.

"Yes Edward" Bella said as she filled hers.

"Can you do me a favor?" She stopped filling her flask and looked at me.

"It depends."

"Don't have ANY communications with Harry Potter or his friends." I told her

"Edward, I'm not going to do that. Its impolite not to say hi if they say hi, or wave back if they wave at you."

"But this is the year everyone is ignoring him, so you wouldn't be impolite. you'd be like everyone else and he'd assume that you didn't believe Voldmorts back." I said as we carried our flasks to the front.

" Well I _know _Voldmorts back" She said as we got our books. and started for the door where Harry was waiting to see if she smiled, waved or said hello. "Harry has had a hard life as it is, and you know whats coming this year." She said referring to Siruse I assumed " And _next _year" Referring to Dumbledore I assumed again. " And the year after that" referring to everyone else that was supposed to die in that book. "So I'm going to make contact with him to let him know I belive him that Voldmorts back" she said, loud enough, I guess, that Harry heard what she just said. I read his thoughts quickly

_**Did she just say Voldmort. and belive me. and is she fighting with him about it. I guess HE dosen't belive me. I can't belive she is sticking up for I'll get lucky and she'll break up with him and be with me.**_ he thought I glared at him.

"...In fact." She started to say

"Hello Harry." she said to him as we walked by the door. she stopped to start talking to him

"Hello. your Bella, right." harry asked.

_**Like he doesn't already know that.**_ I thought.

"Yes. that was really unfair what Snape did to your potion." Bella said.

"yeah, well, snape isent really fair all that much.

"So I've heard she mumbled. "Anyway. I-I just wanted to let you know, well...see...I've notice people ignoring you because of the _prophet_ and I, well, I belive you. Voldmorts returned. Theres no dute in my mind. So...Thats all i wanted to say for now" she finshed blushing

"So you do belive me. you don't think I'm a nut jod.?" he asked.

"Of course not." she said

"What about _him_' he said really quietly nodded his heard towards me

"He belives you too. Our whole famile does."

"really." he said sounding suprised.

"yep. Were with you Harry. no matter what." She said. "We have to get class. I see you later then"

"yeah bye" he said as we walked away. I kissed bella and made sure Harry saw.

_**She belives me. Her whole famile does. I wonder if her mom and dad do too? who cares. she doesen't thimk I'm a nut. and she thinks that Snape was unfair. But she has a boyfriend. But I'm harry potter. The boy who lived. Maby I should just stick with Cho. Then again….**_ His thought went back to Bella, again the way I wish he wouldn't think

_**Great **_I thought _**Me and my big mouth.**_


	5. Chapter 5: Stay away from the Slytherins

**So here is the next very short chapter of Hogwarts, meet the cullens. But first**

Disclamer: Evil voice: "say it"

Me: "no"

Voice: "you must"

Me: "can't make me"

Voice: "If you don't, you can't write anymore"

Me: "NOOOOO!!!!!"

Voice: "Then say it"

Me: "Fine. I..."

Voice: "go on"

Me: "Jeweltherbrat"

Voice: "keep going"

Me: "Donotowntheamazingtwilighsagatorharrypotterseries. There. Happy?"  
Voice: "Yep. no you may continue to write....for now. MUHAHAHAHA!"

Me: *squeak!*

**Chapter 5**

**Stay away from the Slytherins**

**E.P.O.V.**

After double potions It was lunch. We had a full hour and then some so my family decided to go hunting while Bella ate in the great hall. " I'll stay if you want" I said. I didn't want to leave Bella alone for a minute here. "You go, I'll be fine." "Are you positive-" I started to say but she cut me off. "You go. Your hungry. I can tell. and there are a lot of people here. I do think if you kill one of them, That is a change that would make us become trapped in this book." she said with a hint of humor in her voice. thought she wasn't joking. I gave her a skeptical look as I got up from the table and left.

**B.P.O.V**

I finished eating lunch with 20 minutes left and Edward still wasn't back. I figured I should start to go up to divination.

"Excuse me" I said to a girl with red hair. "I'm Bella swan"

I'm Ginny Wesley" The girl said. I was glad I picked the right one.

"Can you do me a favor?"

" Yeah, what is it"

" My boyfriend had to leave to see a teacher" I said thinking of an excuse why he wouldn't be here. " He was supposed to meet me here, but I need to get up to divination. Can you tell him I left if you see him?"

"Sure, no problem. He's the one with the brown hair, right?" Ginny said

"That's him. Thank you." and I turned and started my way up the corridor.

I walked all the way to the stairs case when I heard someone behind me.

"Hay Bella" the person said. I turned around only to be greeted by a boy with Blond wearing Slytherin house colors. Oh no.

"Draco." I said coldly

"Why so harsh Bella?" he said, but before I could say anything he continued "I noticed Harry taking a fancy to you, and of course there's that Edward bloke and that your in Gryffindor, but I was wondering If you would go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend as my date." he said with a little to muck confidences.

"I would love to" I said with sarcasm and false happiness in my voice. He smiled not hearing it and I continued "But unfortunately I make it a point not to associate my self with slimy gits like you who are constantly followed around by monkey servants with the I.Q. of a lamp post. Where are they anyway? Did you send them of to threaten someone for you, or are they stuffing there faces with bananas?" I said.

"Why you little-" he pulled out his wand. I reached for my but was to late

"STUPEFY" he yelled and a jet well aimed red light hit me. I flew backwards into the wall and hit my head. They last thing I heard was hurried foot steps, and felt a pair of cold hand lifting me into his equally cold arms. The last thing I thought: _stay away from the Slytherin's._

* * *

**What do you think? I just thought it would be funny having Draco ask Bella out and you know that as soon as Edward knows that Bella is alright, Draco will get it....or will he? I know that wasent much of a chapter, but I have the next chapter almost done and people wanted me to update. I would also like to say if you have any ideas for something, just let me know in a review. I will also be posting another story soon. Untill I finish writing the next chapter.**

**REVIEW!!!!!!!**


	6. Chapter 6: She found out

**Alright. I'm very sorry this took so long. I have had final exams and I wanted to write the first chapter of Fun in the Sun( It is going to be really funny) But now that those are done, I would like to give you Chapter 6 of Hogwarts, meet the Cullens.**

**disclamer: no matter how many times i wish upon a star, **

**my dreams do not come true.**

**For do I own twilight, and Harry Potter!**

**Nope. so enjoy the next chapter with out ferther a due.**

* * *

Chapter 6.

She found out.

**E.P.O.V.**

_She's going To say yes. I mean, I me. who wouldn't say yes to me?_ Draco thought. I pushed myself to run faster. I know what was coming. Bella finished her speech. any other time I would be laughing, but Alice say what happens.

_She said NO! and insulted ME! she is SOOO going to pay. what spell. I know! D_raco thought.

"Stupefy!" I heard Draco's voice yell. then I heard a bang. There wasn't a bang in Alice's vision. I rounded the corner to see 3 things I did not expect.

1.) Harry standing at the foot of the stairs that lead to the divination room

2.) Bella, crumpled, on the floor near a wall. the load bang was her hitting the wall. I ran over to her and put her in my arms ready to run to

the hospital wing. but not before I saw

3.) Draco, standing with pure horror on his face. _I killed her _he thought. and dropped his wand.

I stopped. He killed her? no wait. I hear her heart beat. Yes. She's not dead. but Draco will be as soon as I know Bella is O.K. I turned to Harry who was looking at Draco with a Death glare.

"Tell professor Trelawney That I took Bella to the hospital wing." I said. He nodded and I took off. I couldn't go very fast because of the students. I hated have to pretend we are normal. Well, as normal as a witch or wizard.

"Bella." I decided to try and wake her up, ignoring the stairs I was getting from people. " Love, can you hear me?" her eyes fluttered and a minute later the opened.

"Edward, what happened." she whispered.

"Draco cursed you." I said. Then I saw the confusion on her face and realization take its place.

"Are you alright? You're not hurt are you?

"No. I'm fine. Actually, I was wondering if I could get down?" I chuckled as I set her down. She swayed a little, then gained what little balance she had. I put her arm around her waist and kissed her lightly on the lips.

"No hospital wing then?"

"Nope. Aren't we supposed to be reading The Dream Oracle in divination?"

"I told Harry that I was taking you to the hospital wing so we have until D.A.D.A. to do whatever we- oh."

"what?

"I can hear Alice's thoughts. They are waiting outside by the lake for us. They want to make sure you all right."

"Lets go see them. Maybe Emmett will wrestling the giant squid." Bella said laughing. I laughed with her. By then the corridors we clear. I picked her up. She was shocked and stopped laughing.

"Edward…?" she said slowly, and I broke out into a full speed run. In 30 seconds we were down by the lake where my family was. We spent the rest of the time outside, were Emmett and jasper took turns wrestling the giant squid. I was thinking of ways to destroy Malfoy. It was sunny out so we were sparkling. I didn't notice her thoughts until it was to late.

**HER.P.O.V.**

While Harry and Ron had divination, I had ancient runes. I was sitting where I normally sit, right near the window. Something caught my eye. I looked out the window. I was shocked. All of the new students, they were SPARKLALING? Who sparkles? Then I thought about them. There in-humane beauty, there skin is... pale white, and ice cold. This morning, there eyes were pitch black and now there a topaz. There are dark circles under there eyes like they never sleep. They haven eaten anything. Since the entire time they have been here. And there wrestling with the squid so they must be super- HOLY CROW! Did he just….but he was just….and then….the are FAST! Wait…..they can't be….

As soon as I Thought what they were, the brownish haired boy, who I bumped into earlier, looked up at me with pleading eyes. I knew I had it right.

And I would only tell two people.

* * *

**Alright, so I hope you like that chapter. In the next one, You find out what Edward does to Malfoy. If you have an idea at what you think Edward should do to him, like a prank or just punch him in the face in the great hall,send me a review. If it is good enought. I will use it!!!!!! so send some ideas and**

**REVIEW!!!!!!**


	7. Chapter 7: Its a long story

**Hello my readers. Thank you to all te people who reviewed so far. I hope to get more reviews for this chapter (Which is 2,700 words long. meaning the longest chapter yet!) **

**I would like to say SORRY!!!!!! (for taking so long to up date.) I had a problem that is way to technical for me to understand fully. But now I'm back. The next chapter for my story fun in the sun is almost done.**

**Also. I have a few ideas for some new storys, but I'm not sure if I will put them up just yet. But if I do put them up, I will make sure I will keep updating this story!**

**I hope you like my new chapter of Hogwarts, meet the Cullens.**

**Disclamer.**

**Me: Please can I have Edward.?**

**S.M.: no.**

**Me: Then Can I have Cedric?**

**J.K.: no.**

**Me: Apparently, I don't anything.**

* * *

**Chapter 7**

**Its a long story.**

**E.P.O.V.**

Vampires! You can't be serious Hermione." I heard Ron say. Harry Ron and Hermione were on the other side of the portrait hole discussing Hermione's theories about us. Of course, she was right. I knew she would figure us out. She managed to do it sooner then I expected. My family and I were outside waiting for the opportune moment to go in and explain that Hermione was right. Lucky for us, no one was in the common room. We had all ready talked about telling the three of them about us Dumbledore, after my, um, attack on Malfoy.

_Flash back_

I was walking across the grounds, lucky me that there was an overcast, when I spotted him with his, what did Bella use to describe them? Oh right, monkeys. He saw me coming towards him and tried to run, but I caught him by his robes and held him up. By now, a small group of people had gather around, including Harry and Ron. Hermione was up in the library with the rest of my family. I promised Bella that I wouldn't kill Malfoy, But I said nothing about scaring him. I thought about turning him into a ferrite, but I would wait.

"Listen to me and listen to me good." I said to Draco, still holding him by the shirt collar. "If you ever, EVER, talk to, ask out or curse Bella again, I will turn you into a ferret, but you in a box, rap it up with a bow, and send it to your father. Do you understand?" I told him in a very threatening voice. The crowd was trying very had not to laugh. Especially Harry and Ron.

"Y-y yes." he stuttered.

"Good. Now get." I said and dropped him. He landed on his knees. He jumped up, and ran,, with the monkeys on his heels. All of them tripping on there way. With that. Everyone burst out laughing. Harry came over and gave me a high five.

"That-was-amazing" he said in between laughs

"Yeah. I never seen Malfoy so scared." Ron said. I left and made my way to get the rest of my family and Bella to talk to Dumbledore.

_End flash back._

"Well, its now or never." Emmett mumbled.

"Banana Fritters" I told the Fat lady. (It was our new password.) She swung opened at let us inside. All talking from Harry Ron and Hermione stopped as they looked at us walking in. I felt jasper calm everyone down.

"Thanks" I said to quietly for human ears.

'Any time' Jasper replied through his thoughts. I looked at Harry, Ron and Hermione. We stood there for a few minutes, not saying anything. Finally, Hermione spoke.

"We know." she said, trying to sound brave. It might have convinced any other person, but She can't hide her feelings from jasper. Or her thoughts from me.

_Oh god, what if they get mad. Maybe we shouldn't have told them. They don't seem surprised that we know._

"We aren't mad Hermione." I said As Emmett laughed at her shocked face when I answered her thoughts. "And no, we aren't surprised either. We knew it was a matter of time before you figured out what we are." Harry and Ron now showed the same mask of shock.

_How did he- but he can't- he answered my- does he know occlumency?_

"No. I don't know occlumency. But I can still read your thoughts. Along with everyone else's. Except Bella's." Hermione blushed, remembering what she thought the first time she saw us. I chuckled and continued to speak

"That's my…Ability. Some vampires get them when they are changed. Like Alice, she can see the future. And Jasper can feel and manipulate emotions." As soon as I said this, A wave of calm filled the room.

"Did you do that?" Harry asked Jasper.

"Yeah, feeling everyone's emotions, plus my own, Is a bit much. Its just easier to have everyone calm, instead of nervousness, shock, confusion, worry, and" he glaring at Emmett "Amusement."

"The future telling will come in handy for divination." Ron said,

"Your different from the vampires in the text book." Hermione started to say compleatly ignoring Ron's comment. "Your supposed to have red eyes, and be blood crazy. Wear black, and sleep in coffins. Be afraid of garlic and burn in the sun, _NOT_ sparkle." My family all glanced at each other and burst out laughing. I was holding Bella up she was laughing so hard.

"What's so funny?" Ron asked, getting slightly angry at us for laughing at Hermione "Sorry." Bella said "Its just, everything you said is a complete stereotype of vampires." she said, trying to contain her giggles.

"Vampires eyes are only red if they drink human blood." Alice said

"And vampires are only blood crazy when there are what we call 'new born's'. When vampires are first changed, they have very little self control over themselves." Jasper said.

"As for wearing black, We do have a since of fashion." Rosalie said

"We're not afraid of garlic. Stakes don't kill us either." Emmett said, still laughing.

"Vampires can't sleep. So where the stupid coffin thing can from I have no idea." I said

"They can't eat either. And, as you saw, they don't burn in the sun either. They sparkle instead" Bella said. "They don't age either. Stupid vampires that live forever." She said under her breath so that only me Em. Rose. Jazz and Alice heard it, which brought on a more laugher, while Bella blushed. We stopped when Harry, Ron and Hermione gave us a confused look.

" We also have super-human hearing, strength, reflexes, eye sight And, my favorite, super speed." Emmett said.

"When you a new born, all of these things are enhanced. Which makes it difficult to destroy them." Jasper said.

"What about Bella?" Harry asked with a bewildered look on his face. "She can't be a vampire too. She doest look like the rest of you."

"She isn't. She's human." I said.

"Won't be for much longer." She mumbled loud enough for Ron to hear.

"Wait…WHAT?" he said, his eyes bulging at Bella.

"Well, you see, it's a very long story." she said.

"I would like to hear it." Harry said. Hermione and Ron nodded in agreement.

Me and Bella told them about or story, with a little help from the rest of my family. For the most part, they listen intently and were a very good audience, gasping or nodding there heads at the right times.. We were only interrupted once by Ron.

"You LEFT her? " He asked. I winced, remembering that time.

"Yes. I am greatly ashamed that I did. I thought she would be better off without me. Safer." and Bella continued on with the story, saying what she did when I left. Then I said what I did when I left. Then came the worst part.

"Edward believed Rose when she told him I was dead. So he decided to, um…… Off himself. Anyway, there are very few ways to kill a vampire."

"Tear him limb from limb and burn the pieces." Emmett said with a smile on his face.

"Yes, or go to the Volturi." Bella said.

"The Volturi?" Hermione asked.

"Yes. Or the vultures, as we nicknamed them. They are like, no they ARE the head of the vampires. They live in Italy." I said. "So I went to them, asking to die. They refused."

"So them what did you do." Harry asked.

"I began to plan. I knew that the only way they would kill me is if I exposed vampires. So I decided that on the day of this huge festival that I would step out into the sunlight, right at noon. You know what would happen if I did. But Bella stopped me, with some help from Alice. But not before Felix and Demetri escorted all three of us down to there castle. We talked and our choices were to join them, or me and Alice could go, but Bella had to die because she knew about vampires."

"So how did you escape. Did you destroy them?" Ron asked excitedly.

"No. we had to promise that we would change Bella. Aro, one of the 3 leaders who can also read peoples thought but only one at a time and only if he is touching the, read Alice's mind, so that they were sure it would happen. She had already seen Bella becoming a vampire, so Aro had no doubt it would happen."

"As soon as we got home, and I woke up, I went over to Edwards and discussed me becoming a vampire. The majority voted yes, but Edwards refused to change me because he doesn't want me to be damned for eternity like he believes."

"what do you mean"

"He believes we have no sole. And that When vampires die, or as he said 'whatever it is we do' that they all go to hell. Like he believes that he is a monster. But you already know that. Any way, his 'dad' for all intensive purposes agreed to change me after graduation. But, here's where mine and Edwards deal comes into play. I really wanted him to be the one who changes me, so If I marry him, he will be the one to change me." Bella said.

"Did he get you a ring?" Hermione asked. Bella pulled held her hand out.

"It was my mothers." I said.

"Its beautiful." Hermione whispered.

"But wait." Ron said. "That doesn't explain why you are all here."

"Well….you see….." I started to say. I looked at the others to see what I should say. Alice Then started to stair off into no where.

"What's up with her." Ron asked pointing to Alice. Jasper ran to he side.

"She's having a vision." he said answering Ron's question.

"Bet Professor Trelawney will get a kick out of her." Ron said to Harry just as Alice was coming out of her vision. Which I saw every second of.

"What did you see." jasper asked Alice.

"There reaction to what Edwards about to tell them. Its fine by the way. They'll take it quilt nicely."

"I saw." I told her. Turned to Harry Hermione and Ron.

"This is most important to Harry." I Told them. "Thought you three are a big part of it to…."

"What is it?" Harry asked.

"Well, in the muggle world, there is a book series…" I said.

"Go on" Harry said.

"And that book series is, um, about your life Harry. Since a little before you got the letter about Hogwarts and Hagird coming to find you to explain about Hogwarts, up until your seventh year. And there is an epilogue, which says what happen nineteen years after your seventh year. Only Bella and I read the books in my family." I told him speaking quickly, but not to quickly that he wouldn't catch what I was saying.

"So my life…is a book…" He said in disbelief.

"Yes." Bella said. I knew what Ron would say next from Alice's vision.

"Can you prove it." Ron asked, just like in her vision. She was never wrong.

"In yours and Harry second year." Bella said. " After Hermione got attack by the baskalist, you went to Hagrid's, where he told you to follow the spiders, which Ron is deathly afraid of." She said.

"Really dude?" Emmett asked Ron. He blushed a little and shock his head.

"So If my life has been turned into a book, did it say what happened at the graveyard last year?" Harry asked.

"Yes. Everything. From what you and Cedric said before you touched the cup, to voldmort rising from the cauldron, even the part where you see your parents." I said.

"And it say what to happen to me in this year through my seventh year and then nineteen years later?" Harry asked

"Yep." I said.

"Cool. Then we can just have everyone read the book, and they will believe me that Voldmorts back. And now that you and Bella know what's gonna happen, you can just tell us, that way we can be prepared." Harry said with a huge grin and so much enthusiasm it would give Emmett a run for his money.

I glanced at my family. We couldn't tell them. 1) it would change the books to much and 2) they wouldn't believe us if we told them. Hermione also thought somewhere along those line. She spoke up.

"Harry they can't tell you what's going to happen" Hermione said slowly.

"Why not?" he asked.

"Well, for starters, If we told you wahst going to happen, you will try to change it. And if the book changes to much, then we Become traped in this book forever."

"Traped in this book?" Hermione asked. Only she would catch that.

"Yeah... Were in the fifth Harry Potter book right now. Edward read a note that caused us to become traped in this book." Jasper said.

"Cool! Were in a book!" Ron said. hermion hit him in the head.

"Stop acting like an idiot." she said.

The rest of the night pased uneventfull. Hermion noticed the time first.

"Oh my goodness. Its 1am. Igoing to go to bed. Goodnight." she said and went over to the stairs that lead to the girls dorm. I lookked down at Bella who had her head rested on my shoulder.

"You should get some sleep to, love." I said. she nodded and I picked her up and started to make my way over to the girls stairs.

"WAIT!" Alice said.

"What." I turned to look at her.

"The stairs turn into a slide if a guy goes up there. It will wake the whole house. I'll take her up there. you go with the guys to your dorn."

I looked at Bella and kissed her forehead

"I love you." Itold her.

"I love you too." She said.

Reluctantly, I gave Bella to Alice and made my way up the stairs to the boys dorm with Ron, Harry, Emmett and Jasper.

Ron and HArry got ready for bed while me and my family just sat on our beds.

"Arn't you guys going to get ready to go to sleep?" Ron asked.

"We don't sleep. Remeber?" Emmett said.

"Right." Ron said blushing.

I missed Bella's Blush. I wish I was aloud to sit next to her while she sleeped. to be able to hum her, her lullaby. hear her talk in her sleep. To hold her n my arms.

This will be a long night.

* * *

**Please. Click the butten. **

**Let me know what you think.**


	8. Chapter 8:Emmett, list, home, internet!

**

* * *

**

Hello there all my wonderful readers. I am back with another chapter of Hogwarts, meet the Cullens.

**I am very sorry about the long update time. I promase that I wont stop writing because of school. This will keep going, along with my other story. Fun in the sun.**

**I would like to recomend, as you wait for the next update, that you read one of these stroies.**

**The first one is compleat already. Its _Amusment park with the Cullens._ by Appy4la. It is very funny and you will enjoy every second of it.**

**The second one is called _The Puppet Master_ by Glitch in the system. this is also very good, but is not compleat yet. but, there is alot of chapters (79 so far, i think) and they are very long chapters. And they are still updating it.**

**Im sorry that this is short, but at least its somthing. I will be updating within the next 10 days (Before my school starts) Hopefully. so look out for the next update.**

**Here is the next chapter of Hogwarts, meet the cullens.**

**Disclamer:**

**I do not own twilight, harry potter, things not to do at hogwarts list or any fairy tales menchened in this chapter. I also don't own the wizard of oz. **

**Some dialogue takened from Harry Potter 5. Again, I do not own these quotes. J.K. does.**

* * *

**Hogwarts, meet the Cullens**

**Chapter 8**

**Emmett...list...home...internet!**

**E.P.O.V.**

When morning came, all of us, meaning Bella, Rose, Emmett, jasper, Alice, Hermione, Ron, Harry and me, all met in the common room. Today was rainy and cloudy, meaning that my family didn't have to skip our first day of care of magical creatures. Which we had permission to do anytime we needed to. Same with herbology.

"No Snape today" Ron said at breakfast. "Hay!" Ron's face lighting up "You think you could bite him. Or Malfoy?"

"Sorry, but I can't. there to important to the story to kill, or turn into a vampire." I said Ron mumbled something that sounded like "Important. HA!"

After breakfast, we all went to double charms.

"Wow. He's short" Emmett whispered as we entered the room. Ron And Harry, having heard the comment, burst out laughing, witch, in turn, caused them to receive wired glances and thoughts that assumed they were crazy.

Professor Fllitwick spent the first 15 minutes talking about O.W.L.s. while standing on a pile of books to see over the top of his desk. After, we spent the time practicing summoning charms, Before we left, he gave all of us, as Ron thought, _The largest amount of charms homework ever._

The same thing happened in transfiguration. Except this time, after the 15 minute lecture about the O.W.L.s, we started vanishing spells. My family, minus Bella, and Hermione were the only ones to vanish our snails, and not given homework. Harry and Ron were now panicking slightly about the amount of homework they had, so we all went to the library. I helped Bella with the vanishing spell and The others managed to look up some uses for moonstone for Snape's homework.

Emmett, on the other hand, took this chance to continue with his list. What list he was talking about, I had no clue. He was blocking his thought by thinking about rose in ways that A brother does not want to know about.

He took a few books and place them on some shelves.

_This will be good._ he thought.

"Emmett what are you-" I started to say but was cut off by Alice's laughter.

"What?" Ron asked looking up from his snail.

"Emmett…list…home…internet…" Alice choked out. Then I knew what list he was talking about. Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts. He must have read it, but at the time didn't get it because he never read the books. This is not good.

"What are you talking about?" Hermione asked.

"at home, someone made a list. Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts." I said "He decided to do some of the things on the list. He's just doing his first one now."

"Second." Bella said.

"What was his first?" I asked.

"The night we got here. We went to see the headmaster, and he skipped down the halls singing 'were off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of oz'" she said. Then I remembered. He did do that. Harry was laughing at what Emmett did and Hermione was smiling but Ron just had a confused expression.

"What?" He asked

"it's a muggle thing. There is a movie and they go to see this wizard, and they skipping down the road singing it. Its funny if you've seen the movie." Alice explained. Ron just shrugged.

"So what is he doing now on the list?" Harry asked.

"I'm putting fairy tales on the shelf. I have snow white and the seven dwarfs, Hansel and Gretel, the frog prince and jack and the beanstalk." Emmett said, which Harry, Bella, Jasper and Alice all laughed at, Hermione smiled, Ron looked more confused and Rose hit him in the back of the head. Which I laughed at.

"Ow." He said rubbing the back of his head.

We continued on with studying. I'm afraid of what will happen when Emmett meats Ron's brothers Fred and George. Speaking of which, should know about us. And Ginny to.

"That's fine. We can tell them later tonight." Alice said, seeing what I wanted to do.

"Tell who what?" Jasper asked his wife.

"Tell Fred and George about us. And Ginny. They have a right to know." Alice said

"Besides, they along with Luna and Neville will need to know soon." I said. They just nodded and counted with what they were doing.

* * *

Our next subject was Care of magical creatures. We all made our way down in the rain to Hagrid's hut. We did our lesson on bow truckles, twig like things that were tree guardians. Malfoy made the hint that he knew where Hagrid was, seeing as we had the substitute professors Grubbly-Plank. Emmett, continuing with the list, did a Steve Irwin imitation while Rose glared at him and the rest of us, except for Ron laughed. We will have to fill him in on some muggle things soon.

The next subject we all had (seeing as though we had all been placed in the same classes. I wonder if Dumbledore had done that on purpose. Putting us with Harry, Ron and Hermione.) was herbology. We were walking to our greenhouse when the nearest one opened. It was the fourth years. Ginny had said hi to Harry. They were going to make a nice couple when next year. Then Luna came out. Oh no.

without so much as a hello to harry she immediately began. "I believe he-who-must-not-be-named is back, and I believe you fought him and escaped from him.

"Er- right." He said awkwardly. The earrings that Luna was wearing was starting to draw unwanted attention to them. Parvati and Lavender were giggling and pointing at her.

"You can laugh" she said thinking they were laughing at he loyalty to harry and not her earrings. "But people used to believe there were no such things as Blibbering Humdinger or Crumple-Horned anorak!"

"Well there were right, weren't they?" Hermione said. "There weren't such things as Blibbering Humdinger or Crumple-Horned anorak."

Luna just looked at her before flouncing away while the radishes in her ears swinging. Lavender and Parvati were no longer the only ones laughing now. Many more students who heard this were roaring wit laughter. Hermione told him he could do much better the her at people who believed him Ernie Macmillan told Harry that him and his family supported Harry. The smile was gone from Lavenders face as we entered the green room to start our lesson.

When the lesson ended wee all headed to the great hall to eat. Nothing much happened, Harry got yelled at by Angelina, the caption of Gryffindor guidance team, for landing himself in detention causing him to miss the Fridays keeper tryouts. At around 5 he left for detention and The rest of us talked about how to tell Fred and George. Ron excused himself and didn't return until later when we were all up in the common room. All in All, a good day. But what was in store for tomorrow, I had no idea.

* * *

**I can see** **Emmett doing alot of the stuff on the list. with some help from the twins. thats all I will give away. If you want more chapters, you must review so I am motavated and I know someone out there is reading this. Thats it, just click the butten. even if you just put "keep going" its nice to get a review. I am sorry if there is anything wrong with the grammer or spelling. and read the stories I suggested! and also, look up the list "Things not to do at hogwarts" and tell me if there is one you want Emmett to do.**


	9. Chapter 9: This isent going to end well

**Hello my fans. welcome to Hogwarts, meet the cullens chapter 9. my computer crashed and I was unable to update. and my wi fi (thats not how its spelled but you know what i mean) got restarted and we lost the pass word to it. it was just a big mess. but im back! and here is the chapter.**

**IMPORTANT! read bottom a/n it is very important.**

**NEXT- seeing as you are all fans of ether twilight or harry potter, i know you will like this book. well, series. its the darkest powers series. the first book is the summoning. the next is the awakining. or the other way around. but its a great book and i suggest everyone go and read it.**

**next order of bissness- HAPPY NEW YEAR!**

**next- im sorry for any spelling mistacks. i no longer have a spell checker seeing as my computer crashed but i tryed my best.**

**what else......Oh! the new moon movie was great! much beter then the first movie!**

**and finaly....**

**HARRY POTTER LOVERS!!!!!!!! THIS IS IMPORTANT!!!!**

**THEY HAVE CREATED AN ENTIRE THEME PARK BASED OFF OF HARRY POTTER! THEY WILL HAVE THE HOGWARTS CASTLE, HOGSMEAD (is that how its spelled?) AND OTHER THINGS. CHECK IT OUT. ITS IN ORLANDO FLORIDA AND IS SET TO OPEN SPRING 2010!**

**On with the story.**

**Disclamer: I, sadly, do not own harry potter. **

**or twilight. **

**or the list of 150 things to do at hogwarts. **

**I dont even own the letter z. isent that sad?**

**Chapter 9**

**this isent going to end well.**

* * *

"Nice of you to join us today, misses and Mrs. Cullen's." professor Umbridge said.  
So she's the one who has the pen so I can write I told you I was hard-core. And call her queen of the toads. I wonder if I can turn her into one so she would really be queen of the toads…

"Don't Even think about it Emmett" Alice said vampire speed just having a vision of Emmett doing all of these things.

"Already has," I told her. Unfortunately, professor Umbridge saw our lips move.

"What did you say?" she asked in a sickly sweet voice.

"Nothing professor" we all said back to her.

"I thought so. All of you, take a seat." we joined Harry, Ron and Hermione.

"She's just a Ray of sunshine." Emmett mumbled.

"Ugh. Look at her clothes. There hideous!" Alice said.

"Please read chapter 3" Umbrige said. In the books, I always hated this professor. Luckily my family and me already read this chapter. Unfortunately, so has Hermione.

"What is it Mrs. granger"

I hated this argument. Lets see, Umbrige just is that stupid to believe what the minister tells her to, Semis is second guessing himself Malfoy is glaring at me, and grrrrrrr, thinking of Bella in that way. He hexed he, but he still wants and thinks he has a chance to go out with her. Argh!! I hate the 'mikes' of the world. I wonder if I really can turn him into a ferret.  
EDWARD CULLEN DONT YOU DARE! Alice though screamed at me. Darn she saw. I hate this class. What us Emmett doing that he's blocking me? Oh well, I will have to find out later because the arguments done with. When will they learn?

**B.P.O.V.**

I feel so special knowing what's going to happen. I wonder if this is how Alice always feels

"It is," she told me as we were leaving DADA and going to divination.

"Your going to have a lot of fun in this class Alice" Edward said

"I think it's a load of rubbish. Hermione said.

"She is always predicting my death." Harry grumbled.

Alice stop short frowning and went into 'vision-mode' before coming out of it smiling "don't worry Harry, you won't die this year," she sang happily skipping down the corridor.

As Harry said just like in the books Harry s death was predicted. Alice almost blew our cover "he's not going to die this year." Alice said, "Excuse me dear?"

"I said he is not going to die this year" "and why do you think that? Going ageist the inner eye, deny that, that is not the grim."

"I'm not denying that's not the grim, but he's not going to die."

"And just what my dear makes you think that?"

"I can-" Edward placed his hand over her mouth and said something vampire speed before removing his hand. Alice look horror struck, guilty and sad.

"I have no proof professor. I just have this feeling he's not going to die."

"What! But Alice you can-" Ron cut off when we all glared at him.

"What can Alice do?" professor asked, "Her 'feelings' normally are always right." I said. "But they are probably not all knowing like your inner eye." that was close. I gave Alice a pointed look secretly saying "you o me"

*Skips to later at night*

"Fred, George, Ginny we asked you to meet us because you are about to be let in on a very big secret. Can you handle the responsibility not to tell until the time is right?" Hermione said. They nodded. We were in the common room. it was late, almost midnight. Everyone had left and it was time to let them in on the secret.

"This must big a big secret" Fred said "Hermione's got her 'I'll kill you if you disobey look.' on."

"It involves you guys doesn't?" George asked pointing to us.

"They probably didn't miss the train"

"Yeah, they just showed up in the common room by acceded."

"And that they're vampires from another dimension" at this they started laughing, As well as Ginny. When they noticed we weren't laughing and looking nervously at each other they stop.

"Seriously?" Ginny asked. We all nodded.

"Except Bella, she's human" Alice said.

"Wicked" the twins said at the same time.

"But your not like the vampires we learn about" Ginny said. We explained the differences to them.

"So you have powers?" George asked.

"I can read minds." Edward said, "I can feel and manipulate your emotions." Jasper said sending out waves of anger, concussion, and a feeling that you get when you're drunk. The twins were smiling when he was done.

"And I can see the future." Alice said.

"Bet triwanly got a kick out of you, eh?" Fred said.

"She kept saying Harry is going to die. At this point, he will live."

"What do you mean at this point" George asked.

"I see the future based off of decisions. So if you decided to let's say, go give peeves a paint ball gun, I will see you doing that and what peeves does with it."

"Hey! That's next on my list!" Emmett said.

"List?" George asked "what list" Fred asked.

"Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts. In our dimension Harry s life was a book and some fan came up with this list. Emmett here is trying to do as many as he can." Jasper said "he's already completed 3" I told them "these were the easy ones. No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class, I will not sing were off to see the wizard when sent to the Headmaster s office. And I will not put books of muggle fairy tales in the history section of the library."

"What are some of the ones you plan on doing?"

Emmett pulled out a folded up piece of paper from his pocket. He unfolded it and handed it to the twins. As they read it the twins, Ginny, and Edward, started laughing. They were rolling on the floor laughing when the finished reading Emmett's list. "We-need-to-help-you-with-these" Fred got out. "Defiantly" George agreed.

"I'll do the sky clad one with you. Just like Alice said." George told Emmett.

"Cool. Lets get started right away." Emmett said. They nodded.

This isn't going to end well.

* * *

**a/n **

**The list that made the twins laugh is 150 things not to do at hogwarts. but i added some comments to it and im going to post it as the next chapter, then as a on-shot add on. so be on the look out for that. **

**for the person how told me what ones you want emmett to do- i will so totaly make them do those.**

**check out the darkest powers series. google it people. google it. its by kelly armstrong.**

**and that ends this chapter. i will post another one as soon as i can.**

**please review. and tell me that this chapter doesnt suck as much as i think it does.**


	10. Chapter 10:The listWITH COMMENTS!

**Alright, so this is the list that Fred and George read in the last chapter. Some of them (most) have comments by Alice or Emmett**

**I need more ideas for this story, major writers block. so....actually. I do have an idea, but I need to figure out how to add it to the story. so...**

**I'm 90% sure I will be putting a new story on here.**

**I'm 10% sure I'm not.**

**I'm 0% sure will this will be.**

**this will be posted as a one-shot too.**

**So, keep reading, and see what had them laughing.**

**Disclaimer: **

**I don't own the fallowing:**

**Harry Potter, Hogwarts, the Cullen's, This entire List, The dark overlord list, the "you may be a pure blood if..." list, star war, lord of the rings, batman, a "wand" (no offence to guys, but I'm a girl) a Holiday tie, a giant squid, Umbrage's Quill, the Potter Puppet pals, the saying "Dude get a life", a frog, a betting pool on the fate of this years DADA, the word pwned, any song said in here, any t-shirts mentioned in here. Pretty much anything you've already heard of in here, I don't own, and probable never will.**

**THIS DOES SWARE!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!**

* * *

Bold words

-already complete.

**Bold underlined words** - comments made by Me, Emmett

_Italics_ - Alice's comments

1. I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor will I insist that their house colors indicate that they are covered in bees. **probably should do whenthere is a feast, Or any meal, in the great hall. More of an audience**

2. **No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class** **this must also be done when Hagrid gets back.**

3. Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not an extra credit project for Herbology.

4. I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood s name is not a challenge. **Have a bet in the common room to see who knows more. Me ageist who? Ask Alice who I m less likely to lose against**

5. When Death Eaters are attacking Hogwarts, I will not point at the Dark Mark and say; To the Batmobile, Robin. _you may have to wait to do this one for a while, em._** Aw man.**

6. I will not go to class sky clad. **Try to see if jasper will join in.** _In no way is jasper allowed to do this. Ask Fred to do it. He will. Or is it George?_

7. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball. **this sucks cause this was last year.** _Don't worry Emmett. I got the headmaster to do another dance. I can't wait until Edward sees Bella in the dress!  
_**Yes. So now I need a tux, which you can get Alice, and a way to apologize for wrestling her a few days ago .oh and a really big fish tank!**

8. I will not use Umbridge's quill to write I told you I was hard-core. **Will this work on vampire skin? If not, must trick someone else to do it. preferably the longbottom kid.**

9. I will stop referring to showering as giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful. **Who the hell is myrtle? And rose will be pissed if I do this. Must get Harry to do. Somehow…**

10. Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. Polishing my "wand" in the common room is not. **I don t get this one.**  
_...Emmett. Think. What do you have that girls don't...And rose would be pissed at if you would show anyone besides her?  
_**…Oh! I get it now. My "wand" hahaha. God. That's funny. *Get Ron to do***

11. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw the Dark Mark on their arm. **See If Harry can draw one......on that Irish kids arm.**

12. I will stop sending forged love notes to Snape that appear to be from Lupin. **Hey Alice, hows this?**

**Dear Snape, I have missed our special time together when you bring the potion to me. I know you enjoyed it as much as I did. But lucky for us I heard there's going to be an order meeting soon. see you then, and bring the rope. love lupin** _This is great Emmett! how did you know about all Snape delivering the potion? _**I heard Edward talking about it once... Remember?** _yeah, he was running around freaking out about it. Esma was so mad when he broke the glass coffee table._

13. Staring a betting pool on the fate of this years DADA teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept. **But.... but...BETS ARE ALWAYS TASTE FULL, SLIGHTLY TACKY, CLEAVE MONEY MAKING CONCEPTS! At least, mine are. Unless I bet against Alice. Then they're just stupid, slightly tacky, and a-good-way-to-lose-your-money concept.  
**_Got that right. No one shill ever win against my awesome power!!!!!! Unless you re a werewolf...._

14. I will not start every potions class by asking Professor Snape if today s project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant. **This is good. It would be better if I could get Hermione to do it.  
**_Threaten to burn all of her books. Then she will do it._

15. Beaters do it with Wood." was not funny, even if the only one not laughing were Oliver. **even better when you think about his last name. how long will it take the twins to realize the triple meaning in this sentence?** _Triple meaning?_ **Yeah, brooms being the wood, "it" being Quidditch. Brooms being wood, "it" being you know what, and wood being Oliver. **_HAHAHA It will take them a full minute, the best being is that they will be laughing at first!!!!!! wait, you need to charm this one to say something different if you don't want them to know. try using this one " I am not allowed to make eyes at Sirius. Lupin will kill me if I try anything."_

16. "You might be a pureblood if..." jokes will get me into trouble. Especially in front of Slytherins. **lets see. I read that list too....how about you might be a pureblood if You met your wife when you were five, at the family Christmas party. or better yet you might be a pureblood if Lucius Malfoy is not only your cousin, he's also your uncle, your great-grandfather, your brother, and, thanks to an accident with a Time-Turner and a genderbender spell, your aunt. oh, i could go on and on.**

17. Seamus Finnegan is not after me Lucky Charms. **Does this school even serve Lucky Charms? I hope so, I love those little marshmallows so much.** _but you can't eat them...._ **I know. but that doesn't rune mine and the marshmallows relationship between the two of us. I still love them no matter what.**

18. I will not refer to the Weasley twins as bookends.

19. I will not refer to the Patil twins as bookends. **Um didn't Harry and Ron say that these girls were there dates last year?**_Emmett, how do you even know that? You didn't read the books. And Edward didn't run around screaming this one. _**Yeah, but Ron told me about it.... it wasn't a pleasant night from what I heard.**

20. "Springtime for Voldemort" is not an appropriate suggestion for the class play. **I already have the line for this. I Can't wait for the twins to read this one. Ron: Following the butterflies. following the butterflies. *Harry and Hermione walk on* Why, hello there Harry. Harry: I'm not in the mood Ron. Hermione: Aw. but Harry, its springtime! Ron: Does someone need a hug? Harry: I do not need a hug. If you invade my personal bubble i am warning you now I will hit you. *You-know-who pops out of no where.* You-know-who: But Harry, its even spring time for me!!!!**

21. Telling Malfoy to 'make like a ferret and bounce,' is always a bad idea. **I know this. remember when Edward started laughing so hard and them Jasper couldn't handle it and we were all laughing for an hour before Carlisle came home and got Jasper to stop.** _Yes i remember. It wasn't even that funny when you think about how long it took us to calm down._

22. I will not swap Draco's broom with one of Filch's. **Right before the first game of the year I will do this. I just need to find one of Filches broom.**

23. I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class. _EMMETT?! Can I PLEASE do this one? Wait...*having a vision* hahahahaha get Ginny to do this. It will be hilarious. More funny then if I do!_

24. I will not add 'according to the prophecy' at the end of sentences to try and up my Divination mark. **Harry and Ron should try this one. They told me how bad there marks are, maybe it will work.**

25. Tricking the schools house elves into stripping does not mean they are now mine even if I yell Pwned! **I would never yell pwned! who ever started that word needs to have eggs and rotten tomatoes thrown at them. I prefer Damn straight!!!!**

26. I am not allowed to bother Snape, and Dumbledore does not routinely have 'Naked Time.' **Alright Alice, I need Jasper for this one. At least the bothering Snape part. unless i am able to...never mind. I want to do this one. please Alice *pouts*** _Actually, Edward might do this one with . he will. of, i am so watching that!_

27. Putting fake spiders in Ron's bed is not funny, even when he tries jumping out the window. **Will he really try to jump?** _...yes he will! Ohmygosh! the best part is the window is closed when he tries to jump!!!!HAHAHAHAHA_

28. I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or a piranha. **Alice** _Don't worry em. I got this one covered. _**You...you...you stole the pen out of my hand!!!**_ get over it em. just keep going._

29. No part of my uniform is edible. I am not allowed to make any part of my uniform edible. **what if I charm others robes to be edible as there walking down the hall? **_that's going to be great!_

30. Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar. _I think you should have Hermione give it to him. or at least, sign the tag so it says it from Hermione. _**At Christmas for sure.**

31. Remarking 'That's what your mum said last night' to any thing anyone says is only marginally funny the first time, and never funny to Harry. No matter how hard Sirius is laughing. **another thing that must be said at Christmas. and Fred or George needs to do this.**

32. I will not lick Trevor. **Who's Trevor? **_um....I don't know......_** Le gasp! You don't!!!!! what has the world come to!** _its come to unknown people named Trevor._

33. I will stop asking the Arithmacy teacher what the square root of -1 is. **Hermione is the only one in this class, so shes the only one who can do this. are we able to see this?** _yes. but it involves a window, and some climbing...._

34. The Ravenclaws are not Mentals in training.

35. I will stop insinuating that McGonagall and Mrs. Norris have an inappropriate relationship.

36. I will not change the password to the prefect s bath to Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty. **I don't know where this is.** _Fred and George do. They'll help you with this one._

37. There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.**I am totally making one of these. rose will look awesome in this.** Y_our a pig, Emmett.....make one for me and jasper too._

38. I will not address the professor with a loud 'Heil Umbridge' and accompanying salute. **Is it possible for me to get our entire class to do this after she says good morning to us?** _*Vision* Yes, and if you wait until they start this club, you can get three out of the four houses to do at breakfast!_

39. Asking How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense? is only funny the first time.

40. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.

41. I will not offer to pose nude for Dean Thomas.

42. 42? Is not the answer to every question to the O.W.L.s.

43. It is a bad idea to tell Professor McGonagall she takes herself too seriously.

44. I am not to Owl copies of the Evil Overlord List to suspected Death Eaters. **Oooooo I know this list!!!!!!!!! it has tips from other overlords of what went wrong for them so you don't do it.**

45. I am not to proclaim myself the new Dark Lord.

46. Replying to every question that Lupin asks with "Are you fuckin' Sirius?" is not funny, even the first time.

47. The fact that Draco Malfoy is short, pale, blond and rat-faced is no reason for me to tell the Slytherins that Peter Pettigrew should be paying Narcissa child support,

48. I will not teach the first-years to sing A Wizard s Staff Has A Knob On The End.

49. If Ginny Weasley wanted to borrow my Darkover books, she would have said so already.

50. I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter. **How do we get him to sign this?**

51. I will not tell the first years, who are waiting to be sorted, that in order to be sorted you must confess your deepest secret aloud while wearing the hat. **Darn, they were already sorted......what if were here next year? maybe we can do this then! Yes!!!!!!**

52. It is exceptionally tasteless to tell Professor Lupin that "once you go Black, you never go back." **Do i say this after I say number 46?...yes. yes I do!**

53. The proper way to report to Professor McGonagall is "You wanted to see me, Professor?" Not "I have it on good authority that you have no evidence." **This is what I will say the first time I get caugh doing one of the things on this list. I need to tell the others to do this as well.**

54. I am not to draw a smiley face on my arm and call it the new Dark Mark. **I will show it when I say that i'm the new dark lord!!!**

55. I am not allowed to suggest that the Gryffindor team practice by playing Strip Quidditch. **I need to get on the team....but how? or maybe Hary could suggest it to Oliver? That could work.**

56. I will not refer to Kingsley Shacklebolt as a Big Black Sex Auror.

57. I will not play the Darth Vader theme song for Professor Snape as he enters the room. **Alice, many people will hum this as he walks in?!?!?!?**_All of the muggle-borns and half-bloods., or those of which know what this is. so, pretty much every one but Slytherin, and some others_

58. Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda. **From now on, I am calling him this in every class.** _The best part, he wont know what your talking about, but most of the other kids do!!!!_

59. I am not the Defense Against the Boring Classes Professor. **I though I was always the teacher of this class?**

60. I am no longer allowed to use the words pimp cane in front of Draco Malfoy.

61. It is generally accepted that cats and dragons cannot interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the result would be. _Emmett. This will just end badly._ **Define badly....** _half of the forest burned to the ground- _**that's not that bad** _I WASN'T DONE YET! Half of the forest burned down As well as your...um..."wand"_ **NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The discrimination, the inequality the unfairness, THE INJUSTICE! WHY!!!!!! OH AL MIGHTY GOD! (If you're out there) WHY???!!!!!!! *SOB***

62. Gryffindor courage does not come in bottles labeled Firewhiskey. **I bet that Nevil kid will fall for this one!**

63. Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the human anatomy is not permitted on school grounds, not even for entertainment purposes. **maybe Malfoy still deserves a little pay back....** _Emmett! That will be the funniest thing! Even Bella wont be mad! She'll be to busy laughing!_

64. I will not create a pin-up calendar of the Slytherin girls and call it "Voldie's angels" **I leave this one to fred and george. and that lee kid.**

65. A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or drumming on desks, no matter how bored I become.

66. It is inappropriate to slip sample bottles of Selsun Blue into Professor Snape s personal postbox. **This needs to be done for the good of man kind.** _And the good of fashion in hair care!_

67. Naughty jokes concerning 'Moaning' Myrtle are only funny once.

68. I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class.

69. First-years should not be encouraged to befriend the Whomping Willow.

70. Novelty or holiday themed ties are not to be worn with my school uniform. **Alice. You're in charge of getting as many Christmas ties as you can. preferably ones that play a song?** _Already done. There's enough for everyone to wear, even the Slytherins!_

71. I will not use my socks to make hand puppets of the Slytherin house mascot.

72. When fighting Death Eaters in the annual June battle of Good v. Evil, I will not lift my wand skyward and shout There can be only ONE! _Emmett, there's a battle at the end of the year. we need to somehow get it so we all do this at the same time._

73. I should not refer to DADA professors as canaries in the coal mine. **I think we need an explanation for this one.....**

74. I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life." to Lord Voldemort. **End of the year battle?** _End of the year battle._

**75. I will not put books of muggle fairy tales in the history section of the library.**

76. There is not now, nor has there ever been, a fifth house at Hogwarts. And I am not a member of that house, nor am I its founder. **All right. This house will be called the house of total awesome-ness and only the people I think are awesome are allowed in. anyone can try to get in but they must pass my test of cool-ness to be welcomed into the house.** _Fred and George will help. you guys can use the ROR!_

77. I will not refer to the Accio charm as The Force. **May the force be with you, young one.**

78. Potter 4, Voldemort 0, is not a valid T-shirt slogan.

79. I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I foresaw her death.

80. I will not use Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations.

81. The four houses are not; The Morons, The Borons, The Smart-Arses and the Junior Death Eaters. **you think I could get dumbledor to let harry say a speach at the end of the year and have him say this?** _yeah. it will work, and everyone will be laughing. even the Slytherins, surprisingly._

82. If asked in class what the Avada Kedavra curse does, yelling It Does DEATH!!! May be correct but it is not the manner in which one should answer.

83. I am not allowed out of my dorm when visitors from the Ministry are here.

84. I am not allowed to lock Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy in a closet to see if hot gay sex will occur. _the ROR will work fo this one two. _

85. Ravenclaw s do not find a sign saying The library is closed for and indefinite time period amusing in any sense. **neither does hermione......**

86. I cannot see the Grim Reaper and I must not say he is standing behind Dumbledore and tapping his watch.

87. A time turner is not a flux capacitator, and I should therefore not install one in any Muggle cars.

88. I am not allowed to use silencing charms on my Professors.

89. I will not charm Hermione s time turner to rotate every half-hour.

90. If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.

92. When being interrogated by a member of the staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce, "These are not the droids you are looking for."

93. I will not scare First Years with tales of an Omniscient author who controls our destinies. **the irony does not fail to escape me with this one, considering we are trapped in there book. hahahahah**

94. Albus Dumbledore is not my personal Jesus.

95. I am not authorized to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort.

96. I will not follow potions instructions in reverse order just to see what happens. **Does this one end bad?** _not telling!_ **please?** _try it and find out for yourself!_

97. I will not claim there is a prequel to Hogwarts: A History that explains about Bilbo Baggins.

98. OMGWTF is not a spell.

99. I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.

100. I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paint-balling. **Um...Alice, I need-** _Already gotten it em, but would you like pink or blue._** how about both?** _fine with me. consider it bought. because it is._ **...That's why you have the laptop with you. to buy all the stuff I need?** _yep. took you long enough to figure that one out._

101. I am not allowed to refer to Susan Bones, Hannah Abbott and Justin Finch-Fletcher as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

102. I will not cast the occasional Oblivate spell on Dumbledore, even if it would be amusing.

103. I am not to conjure the words 'DRINK ME' onto the vials in Snape's classroom.

104. I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and take bets on who will come out alive. **I think I will use the ROR for this one two.**

105. I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they are real animals. **Alice-**_i already bought the ones that would be best for this one, one of which is squrtil_** I LOVE THAT ONE!!!!! **_I know Em, hence the reason I bought it._

106. The fact that there are only 3 Unforgivable Curses does not make every other curse pretty much forgivable. _Ask this to Umbridge, she will freak. and Edward will start laughing at her thoughts which will get him in trouble too!_

107. I will not sing The Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin Quidditch matches. **Bager bager bager bager Bager bager bager bager snake snake snake snake** _Is that all the song?_** ...no...it has some other words....**

108. I will not tell first years that they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.

109. I will not douse Harry Potter s Invisibility Cloak with lemon juice to see if he will become visible wearing it and standing near the fire in the common room.

110. I will not re-enact Potter Puppet Pals in the Great Hall. _The puppets are already made. And I can get all of use to be each person._**let do bothering Snape and wizard angst...and the ticking noise one!!!**

111. I will not yell "Believe it or not!" After any of Dumbledore's speeches.

112. Bringing fortune cookies to Divination class does not count for extra credit.

113. My name is not The Dark Lord Happy-Pants and I am not allowed to sign my papers as such. **you think I can get the twins to do this on both of ther papers....when there writing for the same class?** _yep._

114. Professor Snape's problem is not that he "needs to get laid". **I think Hermione should ask this question too.**

115. I will not attempt to magically animate my marshmallow Peeps.

116. I will never ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling. **Ron is doing this one.**

117. Telling Draco Malfoy I am getting him a ferret for Xmas is not funny.

118. I will not sing the entire Multiplication Rock series during Arithmacy exams.

119. I will not Tie-dye all the owls. **What colors? **_pink. blue yellow and red. and I guess green. so what ever owls fly to Slythering get green, Hufflepuff yellow, ect etc._

120. I will not call Professor McGonagall McGoogles.

121. I am not allowed to make lightsaber sound with my wand. **I think this one should be done in charms class.**

122. Draco Malfoy Takes it Up The Arse is not an acceptable Quidditch chant. _do it Emmett. you need to. its so hilarious._

123. I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween. **get everyone to follow as Death Eaters.**

124. I will not wear my DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT! shirt to school. _how many t-shirts are on here? _**um...a lot...but you can make them all, right?** _Of course Em._

125. I am not allowed to reenact famous battles of the Revolutionary War in the charms corridor. _I'm allowing Jasper to help you with this one. but it needs to be changed to the civil war. much better the the Revolutionary War._

126. I am not allowed to declare an official Hug A Slytherin Day. _before you ask, alot. alot of people. _

127. Bungee jumping off the Astronomy tower is against the rules. Even if it isn't actually written anywhere. _best part is, you can't get hurt if the rope breaks!_** are you calling me fat?**_ no. I'm calling you stupid. _**Oh. well then that's o.k.....wait...HEY!**

128. Asking Flitwick if there is a charm to give you X-ray vision, or remove clothes is not permitted.

129. I will not try and start Naked Thursdays in the Common Room. _the sad thing, everyone who participated in hug a Slytherin day will do this one..._

130. It is not necessary for me to yell "BAMF!" Every time I Apparate. **what does bamf mean? **_bad ass mother f***er. how mad will the Queen of the toads be if I did this in her class? _**Mad. but everyone else will laugh with you tell her what it means.**

131. I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore s office and use it to patrol the hallways. _the password to get in is liquerish twist._

132. I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.**na na na na na na......na na na na na na....*tune of batman***

133. I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.

134. I will not teach the first years to play The Penis Game in the Great Hall during dinner. **WHOA. what the hell?**_ Its when one person says penis quite and then another louder and louder. get it?_**OH. That should be so funny. I wonder If I can get Edward to shout it.**

135. I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue. _Paint already bought._**Your awesome Alice.**

136. I am not allowed to trade first years between the houses** I think we will need to wait until the DA for this one to.**

137. It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously.

138. I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God. _They will be in complete aw of Snape and It will piss him off so bad! he will hate this. and he will never be able to figure out it was you who told them. just tell them your name is Draco._

139. I will not tell Ron & Hermione to "get a room" whenever they start arguing.

140. I will not start food fights in the Great Hall. **Will anyone see?** _*Vision mode* Nope, your safe. they will never know._

141. I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.

142. To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys is not an appropriate career choice. **Who is doing the Carrer thing.....** _Snape. And his response is so funny, you'll laugh so hard._

**143. I will not sing We're off to see the wizard when sent to the Headmaster s office.**

144. I will not sell shirts saying "Quidditch players do it in the air"

145.I am not allowed to play survivor in the common room.

146. Y all check this-here shit out! Is not an appropriate way to announce that you are about to perform an experimental spell.

147. I will not hold my wand in the air before casting spells and shout I have the power!

148.I will not call my wand 'an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.'

149. I will not tell Sir Cadogan that the Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel and then have students yell Ni from various directions. **I think vampire speed will work. If Harry tells him and I run around...**

150. Getting everyone in the Great Hall to do the Time Warp will not earn me any house points. Thriller at Halloween will not either.

**Extra ones I remembered and may want to do:**

Making Harry Potter action figures without his permission is wrong. So is making Malfoy pay double for them.

I will not sing 'Defying Gravity' during Quidditch practice. **Really got to find a way onto the team!**

Providing Peeves with a case of Dungbombs was socially irresponsible and I will never do it again.

I must not tell Nearly Headless Nick that he'd forget his head if it weren't attached.

The Headmasters name is Albus Dumbledore, not Gandalf.

Yelling 'to infinity and beyond' when I take off on my broom was only funny once. **Maybe fred will do this one...**

I will stop calling the Weasley twins Merry and Pippin. I must also not call Ron and Harry, Frodo and Sam. I probably shouldn't call Malfoy, Legolas either.

No matter how creepy the abandoned towers are I will not find Johnny Depp with scissors for hands in any of them.

Taking Polyjuice Potion and walking up to the person you're supposed to be and pretending to be a walking mirror or their long lost twin can make them go insane and is not a hilarious practical joke.

Putting a snitch down Draco's pants is not funny, no matter how long he runs around screaming like a girl.

Spiking the school's pumpkin juice is not funny, no matter how much fun we all had that night.

I am not allowed to hum 'my own personal spy music' when I walk down the hallways.

Next time I see Rita Skeeter I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid.

I will not borrow a prefect's badge for Peeves.

Chemistry and Potions do not mix. Testing this is not wise.

I am not allowed to eat Chocolate Frogs in Potions class. Even if I brought enough for everybody. And emptying a bag full of them onto Snape's desk to prove this last is also not good.

Sending nine rings to senior staff members at Yuletide with the return address 'Voldemort' is not funny.

I will not refer to Remus Lupin as a "nice doggy." Nor Sirius Black.

I am not allowed to tamper with or hide Dumbledore's candy. Even if I think it's funny.

I will not joke that Flitwick went to "Charm school".

I will not stack Trelawney's Tarot deck so the first five cards are the Devil, the Tower, the Hanged Man, Judgment and Death, showing she knows nothing about Tarot and just likes being dramatic.

I will not insist the house elves serve fried snake to the Slytherins.

It is generally accepted that Dogs and Dragons do not interbreed and I am not to attempt to disprove this theory. No matter how "wicked" the results would be.

I cannot perform the Avada Kadavra curse, and pretending I can to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

I will not have a contest to see who can blow up the cauldron first

* * *

**Was it funny? Will you tell me? Please review? Tell me if you see any repeated? and what numbers they are?**


	11. Chapter 11:hey i could use a little help

**Hello My lovely readers.**

**I need your help.**

**So am asking all of you to go to my profile, and read my story , time to choose .**

**Then, vote on my profile.**

**please, my lovely readers. please?**

**I'll have a new chapter up soon, if you do!**


End file.
